This experience was like nothing else! The Ups would give you such hope but the Downs would take you took a depression you never thought you would get out of. My first day home felt amazing. I was able to rest but at the same time being stuck to the recliner was starting to make me feel crazy. I started getting so down on myself and I had to have help to do EVERYTHING. When I say everything I mean everything. Stating with washing my face, going to the bathroom, brushing my teeth and pulling up my pants. You name it, I needed help with it.
Not being able to take a shower sucked and then when you look at the mirror and see yourself you really don’t even know where to begin.. I guess it looked better than I thought (only because of the expanders) But I was a mess… dirty hair, lines still drawn on me and I couldn’t do ANYTHING!
THE DOCTOR VISIT:
Doctor visit day number one, it’s a big visit and you find out all the BIG things. Do I need chemo? Did they get clean margins? Can I take a shower?
I will forever remember these words, NO CHEMO. Thank God. I still had to get confirmation from the oncologist but those were the only words I really wanted to hear besides you can take a shower. My doctor did say I still might need radiation and we will get confirmation from the medical oncologist and radiation oncologist in the next few weeks but things are looking up.
Today I took a shower and felt amazing and although my 70-year-old mother had to help me it was amazing! The smell of the body wash, shampoo, etc was unbelievable. It’s amazing all the little things you take for granted! Today I am so thankful for the amazing medical team behind me, god, all the prayers and the fact that I really did save myself from so much more!
My doctor said I am so lucky that I acted on my intuition or we would be having a way different conversation. Don’t forget to self-check!! It really does save lives!!